Coffee With Hilary and Les from State of Mind Hypnosis and Training Centre

The 3 Parts Of Reprogramming The Mind With Self-Hypnosis

Hilary & Les Season 4 Episode 12

Ask us a Question or Leave a Comment!

We lay out a simple, practical path to reprogram habits with self-hypnosis, pairing science-backed timelines with a three-part script you can start today. A candid gym story shows how identity changes when repetition, imagery, and permission lock in.

• why change begins with the mind and daily self-talk
• six to eight week habit consolidation and what resets it
• using theta-adjacent times for hypnosis practice
• the ladder of I am statements to open permission
• building a three-part script: do, get, feel
• detailed visualization and engaging all senses
• a real journey from resistance to routine at the gym
• recognizing “forgetting” as resistance and limiting beliefs
• how to notice, name, and work with emotional pushback
• preview of tomorrow’s focus on moving limiting beliefs

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SPEAKER_02:

We are on the line.

SPEAKER_00:

It looks like there's a skim of ice across the river and it's cloudy. That's an understatement.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, like clouds up there, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_00:

It is a I would say typical winter morning. There was snow last night, big surprise.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel like it's never ending.

SPEAKER_00:

Little bits every day.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

The birds are yearning for some birdseed.

SPEAKER_02:

Yep. That means I have to leave the house. Get some birdseed.

SPEAKER_00:

But I can't.

SPEAKER_02:

I can't.

SPEAKER_01:

All right.

SPEAKER_00:

There's the weather report. Yep. Let's get on with it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. So yesterday we talked about self-hypnosis, benefits of self-hypnosis, and we touched upon briefly how to sort of write out a little self-hypnosis blurb for yourself. And that was what you want to do, right? Imagine you're writing this out. What do you want to do? How will it make you feel? And what the result will be. So you know, I think I'll I'll uh title this podcast something like the three parts of reprogramming with self-hypnosis that last gave me as a title. But we're gonna go over what each what each means, right? It it seems self self-descriptive, but we're gonna go over what each means and I think you know why we would incorporate that into the self-hypnosis saying. Because I think that's important for people to know like why they're doing this, right? So yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, right, right. Yeah, it was that a question to me. Right. This is one of those days where I just want to be really helpful, and I know that for many people, people like me, you find yourself uh wanting more, wanting different for your life. You are you're frustrated, you're confused, you can be angry about it, you can be despairing about it. All these emotions seem to get in the way of even starting. How do I even get started? And so what I've learned and what I I do my best to spread the word about is that it starts with your mind. It always starts with your mind. There's something in your mind that's getting in the way, and so it starts in your mind. So that's where you start. You start with your mind, and since the mind is this habitual scattered thing, you want to put some order onto it. And you remember that I can choose what I think. And so you make that choice. Now it's gonna seem, it's going to seem silly that just talking to yourself changes things until you realize that you're always talking to yourself anyway. You're always talking to yourself anyway, and it's it's often not very pleasant, it's often not very supportive, it's often not very loving. And that's okay. You're normal. This is what you've been taught to believe is discipline, right? And the fact that you're frustrated, the fact that you're despairing is proof that that isn't working, but it is having an effect. And, you know, there's there's mountains of science on thoughts, habitual thoughts, and how that stuff impacts us and impacts our day, impacts our emotional base, impacts our expression of ourselves. This is all just really, really normal. There's nothing wrong with you. It's just that you've never been taught how to use this equipment that you have in a way that actually leads you where you want to go. And as we have spent, I've spent years practicing this and had significant shifts along the way. And I've also, over years, forgotten about this stuff for significant periods of time, found myself in despair and wondered what the heck's going on, realizing I've forgotten. It starts with your mind and it starts with what's going through your mind, and you can turn anything into a habit. And so that's where it starts.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I think to your point about how we we stop it and then we recognize again at some point that we stopped it. I think it's so normal for us to start something, start to feel good. And then because you know, feeling good and um doing what you want, feeling how you want to be feeling, is so natural and normal that we forget to put the work in again, right? And then we slide, we tend to slide backwards and then go, oh my god, when did I stop doing that? Right. Very normal for that to happen.

SPEAKER_00:

And the mind is is habitual and it will drop back to old habits if we let it.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

It takes a long time. And what they found in science is that there's a threshold and in and around six to eight weeks where a habit will lock in. Whereas as soon as you stop, you might get to five and a half weeks, and then you stop, you go right back to the beginning. You have to, it's not like, oh, I'll get a half a week in next week. No, it's it's gotta be that six to eight weeks solid in a row. So you're thinking, you've got to be thinking for the next two months. For the next two months, I'm going to get in this habit or this practice. I'm I'm I'm gonna choose that and I'm gonna stick to that.

SPEAKER_02:

Which seems like a lot when you first think about it. Oh my god, two months. And then most of us, I'm speaking about myself really, we don't dive in, and then five months pass, and you look back going, oh my god, like that passed in a blink of an eye. I could have done that, I could have, I could be here now, like I could be this far ahead, I could have this habit now, and then you're starting all over. Maybe.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, the unfortunate thing is seldom are we working in a vacuum, right? We're working against existing habits.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

And those habits are established, which means the day we forget to work on our new habit is the day the old habit comes back.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

And then it gets reinforced. And this is this is this is a big deal. And it's so important to be forgiven with yourself because you've spent for some people, you know, 40, 50 years they've spent thinking a certain way.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

And then they find themselves realizing that that thought pattern, that way of thinking of themselves or the world is just not working for them, not serving them, not helping them. And then they want to make a difference. And they make that choice and they make it with a good heart and best intentions, but it is starting something that is offsetting something you've been doing for 50 years, 30 years, or however long. The point that I'm making is that it was practice that turned that into a habit. It was repetition that turned that old way of thinking into a habit. It's the same forces that turned it into your present thought pattern that you are going to use to change that thought pattern. And it's about time and it's about commitment to it. And when you do, when you say, absolutely, I'm going to work this till it becomes a habit, and you you hang with it, and months pass, you will start to you will start to notice little shifts in yourself, but there will be a point where this actually locks in and it becomes your new way of being. And it's it's absolutely real that that can happen. And what needs what you need is to make that commitment, to make that choice, and to stick with it, to to to be just so constantly methodical about it, so deliberate about it. And this is where people will put stickies up on their mirrors, they will get a tattoo, they will do all kinds of things to help themselves remember it. And that's beautiful, right? That's beautiful. That's a commitment to yourself, that's a commitment to change, that's a commitment to something better, that's a commitment to do what it takes, and that's fantastic. I'm I'm drawn to tell the story. Two and a half years ago, we were working in this community, and the people we knew in this community were all going to the same gym. Our beautiful, wonderful friends at Carbon Heights, Carbon Heights Fitness Academy. They were all, everybody we knew was going to this gym. And Hillary came to me and said, I want to go. And I said, We got a bike machine in the garage, we'll get you a treadmill. Don't worry about it. And she was, no, I want to go. And I was like, Oh, it's gonna cost a lot of money. And she was like, I want to go. And I want to be around these people, I want to do that thing. And I knew that from the look in her eye, she was gonna do it. And I was either gonna stand on the sidelines or I was gonna get in. And it had been years since I belonged to a gym or had any kind of real habits towards my health, right? When I was young, I was very athletic, and I was able to ride that for 30 years. Take advantage of how good, what good shape I was in when I was young. But absolutely I wasn't in good shape. We signed up for the gym, and I was resistant from the start. And when we went in the gym and I looked at some of these athletes who are incredible and they and I admire them, and now today they are my they're my example. I watch them and I use them to motivate myself. This is, you know, these are people that are working hard to make their body the most effective thing it can be. And you know, our coach, Kansas, wonderful Kansas, she said it's really simple. You gotta show up. You gotta show up, you gotta show up a minimum four times a week. You just gotta show up, and it's four times a week, or you're just not succeeding. And I got myself up to going three times a week, and that was, you know, this week I'll go four times, and next week I don't go at all. And the week after that, I'll go two times, so the week after that I'll go three times. It was very inconsistent. Every morning the question was, are you going to the gym? Every morning we considered it a new choice, and it took us months. I was six months going a little bit here and a little bit there. And then one month I said, I want to get my 16 in. I want to go four times a week for all four weeks. And I did it, and it felt like an accomplishment. But now this is six months in, and I'm still not noticing a whole lot of differences. But that was like a turning point. And then I accomplished it again the next month, and I noticed that I had lost weight. But more importantly, I was able to do these exercises better. Anyway, it's been two and a half years. And now it's never a question, are you going to the gym? If if if we can go to the gym, go to the gym. It's not a question, it's a habit. It is a habit so much so that I feel like I'm missing something when I don't go. I feel like I need to go when I don't go. I I always take, almost always take weekends off. I don't go Saturdays and Sundays, but Monday comes and I'm dying to go. This is a shift, and it's a shift that took a long time. But where I am now today, two and a half years later, I can't imagine myself without the gym. It took two and a half years. Let's just, I just have to admit that. It took two and a half years and pretty much almost a full year of intermittent commitment and finding the way that it fit into my life, that I could make time for it and not feel like I was missing out on something else.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

And going and doing the workouts, because the workouts sometimes are way beyond, way beyond my abilities, and working through the intensity of the day after aches and pains. Two and a half years later, absolutely, I'm physically a different person. I'm mentally a different person. I am absolutely committed to this for the rest of my life. I had visions of myself in my 80s, still going to the gym and still slogging away and doing my best to lift weights and do burpees and all that stuff that I used to hate. And now it sounds twisted, I think. I love burpees because I do them so much better than I used to. I used to just sort of fall on the floor and hope to God nobody noticed. Now I'm amazed at how many burpees I can do before I'm totally exhausted. Anyway, I say this because it is okay that something might take you two years. It is okay that you're gonna spend six months trying. It's okay. It's okay that it's hard to find a way to be truly committed to this change. That's okay. You've been practicing the old way all your life, and you're really good at it. And developing a new habit is truly an accomplishment. And if you want to read more about this kind of habit stuff, read atomic habits. It's a good book. And it explains the science behind all of this. But apart from the science, the science explains it. In the end, it's a choice that you make. And you have to make every day, you have to make all the time, over and over and over, for months. But the really cool thing is that works. That actually works. Making that decision, making that choice, committing to it on a whatever frequency you need, committing to it and hanging in with it for six months to a year actually works. You can do this. And you need to just forgive yourself for having spent most of your life not doing it.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

That's just, that's just the way it was. So I think that's the big thing. I hope that's as emotionally charging as I tried to make it. I hope that I've tapped into your heart and your and your commitment to yourself, your love to yourself, your desire is legit, you're allowed, you're entitled. It's gonna take some effort. Absolutely positively. I tell you from experience, it works and it's worth it. So yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I think since we're on the topic of self-hypnosis and creating that little saying for yourself, I think, you know, I suppose we could use this as an opportunity to use me as an example, and we can build out a self-hypnosis phrase. Because I I can only use myself as an example. And I don't mind. So uh Les is talking about the gym and how I made him go in the B. It's our joke now.

SPEAKER_00:

And uh grateful now.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, it was meant to be, it was just part of our path for me to make him go to the gym. But I had I I had a different experience with it. I started off strong, as we all, you know, many of us do. And I had many, many hiccups. I'm very happy you made him go. So I had many, many hiccups. So I would go to the gym for a month and then I would hurt myself. Uh just a a word to the what word to the wise, word otherwise. Don't try to go into competition mode with people because you're only gonna hurt yourself. So I would hurt myself and then I would stop going for a little bit. And then I would have I have I have over years now had issues with my nervous system being just over the top. So then I would have sleep issues, and then I would stop going for a while, and then I would go for a while, and then I would hurt myself again. And I and it was just this back and forth, and so I couldn't really get into a good rhythm. And then September hit of this last year, and man, oh man, I hurt my back like so bad, so bad. And I was off for three months, and then I got in, I I was started to go back a little bit, but I couldn't get that traction going. So I think, yeah, I think it if you're open to it less, we can like you know, talk about how we build that little phrase and then just use me as an example, right? And so we can build out a little phrase using the gym, I guess. Uh-huh. So what do you think of that?

SPEAKER_00:

Sure, sure. Absolutely. So the idea of self-hypnosis, as we've talked about, is simply to take yourself into the theta state and then begin the process of programming yourself in a new way. I think the important thing to do is to remember that you are programmed and you're actually right now programmed not to do the thing you want to do.

SPEAKER_02:

Very much so, yes. Right? There's so many better things I could do. In my mind, I think it's better.

SPEAKER_00:

And your intention is to change that program, and that's step one. So I'm going to use the theta state. I'm going to go into the theta state. I'm going to do it regularly. I need to do it probably at least two times a day, most effectively, three times a day.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

To be able to really have an impact on the way my mind works, the way my program is. So now I have to see myself doing that. And the easy way to do it, the easiest way to do it is to know that you're going to do it when you wake up, as soon as you wake up. You're going to already be pretty close to a theta state, and you can do it as soon as you wake up. And, you know, we always lie in bed with our mind churning. So now we're going to lie in bed and we're going to churn. In our mind. We're going to get hold of the controls and we're going to do it. We're also going to do it at night when we go to sleep. And that's the most powerful thing, is as you go to sleep, once again, pass into the theta state and you spend a few moments there working your hypnosis. Now, if you are living a normal life, it's really hard to find 10 minutes in the middle of the day because your life is already habitual. Your life already has its sequence of events. You do this at this time and this at that time, and you're just, your life just seems to go in the same sort of order all the time. So this is the hard part. Where do I find time in the middle of my day? It's 10 minutes. That's all you need. 10 minutes, 10 minutes in the morning, 10 minutes in the middle of the day, 10 minutes before you go to sleep. You are going to notice the effect of hypnosis. So you've got to find that 10 minutes in the day. Now, it doesn't matter when in the day. It can be in the pre-noon, afternoon, even in the evening. Optimally, it's somewhere in the afternoon. There is a transition time that most people go through when they go from work to home. And I suggest, and it's not the same for everybody, but I think it's a good opportunity. That time of day, you just get home. At that time, we're all pretty much shifting. We're all pretty much coming down. We're all sort of taking deep cleansing breaths and trying to get ready for the evening. Some of us have to make that shift fast, but if you can carve out 10 minutes there, I think that's the optimal time. Maybe it's 10 minutes before you go home. Maybe it's get in your car, get on the subway, get on wherever you and take the 10 minutes then.

SPEAKER_02:

Don't close your eyes, obviously.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, it's before you move the car. Right? Just sit in the car for a few minutes, right? Or if the day is done, just sit at your desk after everybody leaves. But the point is, is you got to find 10 minutes there. And I'm I'm telling you, absolutely positively, if you carve those pieces out of your life and you use them this way, you're gonna notice a shift. You're gonna notice a change. It's just it's just the way it works. It's just the way the mind works. And it's you using your mind for your benefit. All right. So first thing is you have to get into hypnosis. And so let's take the gym and and say that I want to go to the gym. So before we build your statement, let's deal with, I'm gonna put all of this in a document. I'm gonna put it all in a document and I'm gonna put it on the school. And it's just as simple as I can be. So there's this thing that we call the ladder, and I think it's a really useful tool. And so just come up with a simple phrase for this. In this case, you know, it's Hillary wants to go to the gym. So we're just gonna say, go to the gym. And we use these short phrases based in the concept of I am. Now I need to take a minute and talk about that, but we're gonna use these phrases based in the concept of I am, and you're gonna use these I am statements to take you into a hypnotic state with your eyes closed and taking deep cleansing breaths and shifting to a focus on the inside. Right, you're going to use the phrase I am allowed, I am free, I am worthy, I am able, I am supported, I am meant to, I am destined to. So I'm gonna write those out. They're going to be in the school. And using those I am statements and using Hillary's example, you know, I am allowed to go to the gym. I am free to go to the gym. I am able to go to the gym. I am supported to go to the gym. I am meant to go to the gym. I am destined to go to the gym. And you start just saying those things inside yourself quietly and calmly. And you will start off doing this just by reading them because you're going to write this out and you're just going to read them. But sitting, looking at the paper and reading them is going to be a wonderful experience. And pretty soon, sitting, reading them, you know, you can you can put them on your phone, right? Sitting, reading them is always repetition, is always a hypnotic experience. So that repetition alone is moving you towards it. Now, once you start doing that, now you're going to add to that go to the gym. Because at this point, you've said this to yourself a bunch of times, and you've got yourself into an alpha or even a theta state. And now you're going to say to yourself the full statement, right? The full statement is built on what do I want to do? And we use a lot of detail. What do I want to do? What is it that I'm not doing that I really want to do? And I want to know the details and the specifics, right? And for me, the specifics are you know, I am free to go to the gym for the 915 class every weekday. And now there's the details. I am free to go to the gym at this time and do this. And what am I going to do? And you want to put detail in that because it the subconscious mind, and this is something I meant to say, but I didn't say subconscious mind doesn't know the difference between imagination and reality, right? But think of most of your worries. They're all imagination. Think of all the things that that get you upset. That's all imagination. The subconscious mind doesn't know the difference. And so the subconscious mind loves it when you imagine because it helps it to see and understand. And so when you're saying what you're going to do, you're putting as much detail on it as possible, and you are visualizing it, you are sensing it, you are picturing it, you are feeling it. You know, what's it going to smell like? What's it going to taste like? What's it going to feel like? All those things. You want to activate all your senses as you imagine doing it. I am allowed to go to the gym at 9.15 every morning and engage in the workout. This is what I'm going to do. Very specific. And I'm imagining it as I say it to myself. The next thing, the next part of this is what am I going to get out of this? What are the results? What is the positive impact on my life? So to continue to use that example, I'm going to go to the gym at 9.15 every day and engage in the workout. I am getting stronger, more flexible, and more healthy every time I go. So that's what you're getting out. Now, your motivations are your motivations. Everybody's Hillary's got to come up with her own motivations. What is it that she wants out of the gym? What is it going to get her? What is it going to bring her? What is the result going to be? You know, creating, you know, creating the world-class bodybuilding body that I've always wanted. It's whatever you really, really want. This is what I'm going to do, and this is what I'm accomplishing. And again, when you say those parts, you're visualizing, you're experiencing subconsciously. You're experiencing in your imagination, you're engaging it completely. You're having fun with this, right? As when we were kids, we loved imagining. So just have fun with it. You're only taking 10 minutes, you're not hurting anybody, right? You're going to write this out so that this is what I'm going to do in detail. This is what I'm going to get out of this in detail. And then you're going to talk about how you're going to feel. Feeling stronger and more alive than ever. Feeling stronger, more confident, feeling my best. What are the feelings you want out of this? So it's now what you're going to do, what you're going to get, and how you're going to feel, but you're doing the whole thing in detail and you're imagining it. So you've taken yourself with a simple statement I am I am free to go to the gym. I'm allowed to go to the gym. I'm worthy of going to the gym. You know, you're going to say these statements, and then you're going to dive into I am free to go to the 9-15 class every day at the gym, engage in the workout, building the body I've always dreamed of, and feeling confident and strong and proud of myself. This is what programming is with the subconscious mind. It's about actions, events, it's about meaning, and it's about emotion. It's about feeling. And those three things come together in these I am statements. And in doing so, you're giving yourself permission and you're imagining how wonderful it will be when you do it. Now, you start with your mind. That's the place it begins. And you start with these statements. And yeah, this is going on in the school. And if what you want, join our school. And if what you want is some feedback on your statement, right? Let us know. We'd love to help you shape it and so that it is everything you want it to be and that it's hypnotically effective. So just reach out, just send us a message. You can do it in the chat and share your experience with others, or you can do it just privately in a message. We'll make that happen. But please feel free to let us help you shape this. So what's going to happen when you do? What's going to happen when you you you you carve this out and you start doing it in your life? You're going to experience emotions, hopefully, really exciting ones. Sometimes resistant ones. And that's the power of the imagination. Imagine it anyway. Picture it anyway. See the results anyway. The subconscious mind might give you resistance, but you're in charge. You are the awareness behind your mind. You are the one using the mind. You are the one who can choose what goes on in your mind. And you are the one that gets to choose what you do. And repetition and deep imagination is going to have a huge impact on you. A huge impact on your subconscious mind.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. And if you can't, if you can't so much imagine it, just bring in all the senses. Try try your best. Like I was working with someone yesterday that could smell, right? Could envision, but could feel, really feel the statements being made. And yeah, I think it's very normal. I think before we wrap up here, just to chat about resistance and and when you feel the res uh resistance, if you do, to note that Les went over a series of statements and maybe note which one sort of has that little pang in the body where you feel, ooh, I might not, maybe that's not a good statement for me. But it doesn't mean it's not a good statement. It means that it's just bringing up some resistance that needs to be looked at. And that resistance is largely limiting beliefs, right? About your ability to accomplish what you set out for yourself. So yeah, well, what day is it? Thursday. Maybe tomorrow, talk about that resistance, talk about limiting beliefs and how you can move them, how you can do this for yourself and and not be worried that, oh well, if I have a resistant feeling that I can't deal with it right then and there on the spot.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, so again, we're gonna reframe that. If this self-talk, self-hypnosis, is going to trigger limiting beliefs, that's good news.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_00:

Because you're gonna find out why you don't. Yeah. The limiting belief is the reason why you don't. And for most people, they come to us and the first thing they say is, I don't know why I don't. I don't understand why I don't. And that's where we as hypnotists get involved. And yeah, all of you, every, every and anybody listening, yeah, just reach out. Like that's what we do. That's what we love to do, is help people with their limiting beliefs so that they can do the things they want to do and stop doing the things they don't want to do anymore. These are these are habitual thoughts that are deep inside you, probably acquired as a child, that are creating a resistance to this thing that you really want. And if what you're doing is saying, trying to do this self-hypnosis and you're not finding the time every day to do it, or you're forgetting to do it, that's not forgetting. That's resistance. That's your subconscious mind tricking you into going straight to the old program, jump right past this attempt, right? That's that's the magic. So if these kinds of thinking patterns, these kinds of self-hypnosis techniques are triggering in you emotions, or you're noticing that it's really easy for you to dodge this or miss this, that's a limiting belief. That's a subconscious mind hanging on to a limiting belief. And that's great because now we found it, right? Now we found the thing that's getting in the way. So see that as an adventure. See that as an exploration of yourself. See that as this wonderful experience of learning more and more about who you are and how you think and what kind of things are buried inside you as beliefs that maybe you just don't believe anymore, at least not rationally. Maybe you don't want them around anymore. Maybe this is a massive, kind of beautiful cleaning of house in your subconscious mind. And when people do that kind of thing, when they go into their subconscious mind and say, I don't need this anymore, I don't need this anymore, I don't need this anymore, and they clear that stuff out, their life changes dramatically and instantaneously. It's amazing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Excuse me. So tomorrow we'll look at uh the resistances and the limiting beliefs, give you some techniques to move them. Yeah, move them. Move them out of the body, move them through the mind and out. So thank you for hanging out today. I mean, if you want to hang out with us, just join the school. You can join the school for free and get access to the podcast link in the calendar. And we'd love to have you. All right, have a good day.